I approached this assignment with trepidation--I have made paper before in various fiber arts classes without enjoying the experience. I remember the seemingly arduous process of breaking the paper down into workable pulp, which then felt unpleasantly cold and wet between my fingers. In the past the idea behind the process has also frustrated me--using paper to make paper seemed wasteful and pointless, especially when the final product resembled a colorless lumpy form that was difficult to write or draw on. There were two aspects of my current papermaking that have changed my ideas surrounding the process. First, was the way that I made the paper itself. I decided to tear sheets of notebook paper into thin strips and small pieces, and then boil them on a low heat, occasionally stirring and disrupting the dissolving paper. The paper broke down quickly into a pulp, and after straining and cooling the pulp was warm to the touch. The warmth emanating from the pulp changed the sensory experience for me. Working with the warm pulp felt more like working with something charged with a living energy, rather than a cold pile of lifeless mush. Shaping the paper was more enjoyable. Second, I was able to appreciate the powerful metaphors held in the process now that I am thinking about making and materials through a therapeutic lense. Papermaking offers the opportunity for transformation as well as a dual experience of destruction and creation.
Because of the potential symbolism inherent in the process of papermaking, I believe that this is a successful intervention for adolescents with trauma and stressor related disorders. Adolescents are constantly in the midst of change and transformation, in both overwhelming and beautiful ways which makes the process particularly relevant for this population. Secondly, trauma is a profoundly transforming experience, one that alters our bodies and minds and the ways in which we interact with ourselves, others, and the world. It is a fragmenting experience, and in healing we come together into a new whole that incorporates both the old and the new in a meaningful way. For this process, I would like to use materials that have some kind of personal meaning such as old diary entries, letters or documents that hold an emotional charge or connection to past traumas. The first step of the process contains the fragmentation of an original object through tearing, shredding and ripping. This is both a metaphor for the experience of the self during the original trauma as well as a cathartic release through destroying something that contains part of that trauma. The other steps of the process represent incorporation and repair. The final art piece is a new product that holds all of these things in tandem and further represents a vehicle or surface for future change and transformation. The repetitive, kinesthetic process also provides an opportunity for deeply soothing physical healing. Trauma is stored in the body, and can be reworked and released through movement and regulatory stimulation (Van der Kolk, 2014).
References
Van Der Kolk, B. (2014). The body keeps the score: Brain, mind and body in the healing of trauma. Penguin Random House.